How to Overcome Loneliness | How to Overcome Loneliness

How to Overcome Loneliness

Mental Health

Tamika Lewis February 1, 2022

There comes the point in everyone’s lives when the question of how to overcome loneliness becomes one of the most important problems. The feeling of being disconnected, alienated, and isolated can be brought about by many things. But, by pinpointing the specific circumstances that lead up to where you are, it’ll be much easier to resolve them. Keep reading to find out more.

Loneliness Isn’t Comfortable, Yet It’s an Integral Part of Life

Two things about alienation are certain – it’s uncomfortable and unavoidable. No matter how well you take care of yourself and how many good emotional support systems you have, the feelings are bound to creep up sooner or later. And that is probably a sign that you need to switch something up in your life.

It can be hard to recognize the need for company amidst matters that seem more pressing, such as dealing with work stress and situations that brought it up. In a world where social media is so omnipresent, realizing that you crave a human connection is even harder to pinpoint. After all, you might think: how could I desire connection when I’m constantly communicating with people? Well, that’s because humans crave more intimacy than what a phone brings. In order to resolve these issues, we want to talk about understanding and overcoming loneliness.

What Is the Main Cause of Loneliness?

“What is the root cause of loneliness?” is an age-old question many philosophers, therapists and psychologists, and people, in general, tried to answer. While every case has its own, fairly individual reason, some similarities can be drawn between a multitude of cases. Here are some of the main causes that may have brought you on the path of figuring out how to handle loneliness:

  • Social isolation – Whether it’s the case of getting over a breakup, divorce, or a move to a different country, you may feel lonely if you had to figure out how to calm yourself down without your standard support system.
  • Poor social skills – If you couldn’t make friends over the course of your life, there’s a chance that you didn’t grow up to have adequate social skills, which can bring up feelings of loneliness regularly.
  • Introversion – Being social as an introvert can be a genuine struggle. Depending on what type of introvert you are, you may have more luck finding the perfect extent of social and alone time with the help of group women’s counseling.
  • Increased symptoms of anxiety and depression – An overwhelming mental health crisis and receding mental health can have you questioning all things in your life and withdrawing socially, increasing the feeling of alienation from others.
  • The solitude contagion – Research shows that alienation can be contagious since those who aren’t lonely experience feelings of isolation more often when spending time with people who already feel this way.
A young girl looking for help
Many causes can make you more susceptible to feeling isolated, including context and mental health predispositions

How to Overcome Loneliness?

There is no one-size-fits-all cure for how to stop feeling lonely, but there are some standardized self-care methods that may help you battle solitude. When it comes to feeling alone in the world, some approaches have proved to be better than others, so let us share the lessons therapy for women of color taught us are the best for getting over alienation.

Find Ways to Be There for Yourself

While it might sound like a paradox, the key to battling solitude isn’t in other people but in ourselves. When a person is dealing with hardship in the world and their day-to-day responsibilities, it is easy to end up too exhausted to perform self-care rituals. That includes tending to your need for fun, play, and human contact as well.

It also means becoming aware of the ways in which you talk to yourself and changing them for the better. Maybe what you need in order to feel better is the resolution that you will be the one to take care of yourself. Because when you speak to yourself kindly and take care of your needs, you are showing yourself that even in times when a connection to others is scarce, there is still someone who will show up – and that someone is you. And there’s no better feeling!

Spend More Quality Time With Your Friends and Family

As already mentioned, social media today can provide us with a false sense of connection by feeding us crumbs of human interaction. If you are feeling lonely, it may be indicative that you need more from your connections. So, put the phone down, and go out with a friend you like or a family member for a cup of coffee, a walk, or a dinner outing. You may be pleasantly surprised to see that you already have everything you need within arm’s reach. Maybe you just didn’t know in which direction to look.

five-women-laughing after therapy
Maybe you already have all the support you need from your friends and family, but you just don't know it yet

Maybe It’s Time to Get Out There and Meet New People

If you’ve tried being more mindful of your own strength and the presence of others too, and you are still wondering how to not be lonely, more “drastic” measures might be in order. And by that, I mean going out and meeting new friends. If you’ve stopped wishing for an ex to come back to your life, and you’re ready to start dating again, maybe it’s time to embark on a new journey of self-discovery and fun.

Two women talking
There are so many humans out there you'll get to know, like, and even love - you just have to find them still.

Take Care of Yourself and Expand Your Friend Circle at the Same Time With the Help of New Hobbies

One thing is certain – meeting new people isn’t always the easiest. Fortunately, finding a hobby is an excellent way to make the potentially stressful process so much easier. You may find that you actually feel lonely because you don’t have someone with whom you can share certain interests and emotions. Getting out there and being more involved in your own interests can be a stellar route to finding someone to share it with.

Starting a ceramics course or getting into sport can help you come across people with similar world-views, who would be very excited to talk to you about various topics. Additionally, starting hobbies is a great way to make progress with yourself and achieve a personal goal, as well as get out of the rut you’re probably stuck in currently. For more ideas on how to expand your friend circle, check out this video.

Although Often a Hinderance, Social Media Can Also Become a Way to Overcome Those Lonely Feelings

Although it’s been said over and over again that the internet keeps distancing humans from one another, it can also be a great way to expand your friend circle. This is an especially useful tip for introverts, who may have a harder time meeting new folks in everyday settings. There are so many groups and chat rooms where you can meet folks similar to yourself, and even online gaming can be a great place to meet people.

At the end of the day, sometimes just reading forums and scrolling TikTok can remind you that you are not alone in this world. There are so many other people out there who may understand you – even if they cannot hold your hand.

A girl on her phone
You don't always need physical contact or presence to feel less lonely

Researching “Counseling for Women Near Me” Could Be the First Step On Your Road to Fight Alienation

Sometimes the question of how do you get over loneliness seems impossible to answer even if you’ve tried all the tricks in the book. In that case, your next best option could be to do an online search for a “therapist near me” and book your first therapy appointment. We all need help with mental health, and it’s safer to ask for it in times of need rather than hope for the uneasiness to pass.

A licensed therapist of color can help you take care of your mental health and find new mechanisms for overcoming hard emotions such as alienation. Even more so, a counselor for women will better understand your specific structural position in the world and provide you with help that is tailored to your experiences and struggles.

A woman in therapy
Researching "women's therapy near me" and initiating contact with mental health professionals is the most reliable way to get better

Life May Seem Overwhelmingly Lonely Now, But This Feeling Shall Pass Sooner Than You Might Expect

Whether you plan on seeing counselors for women or getting out of your comfort zone all on your own, we are sure you’ll find an answer to the age-old question of how to stop being lonely that will work for you specifically. The fact that you’ve recognized how you feel and are seeking a way to overcome the problem is already a huge milestone in itself. So keep up the good work because there are only good things ahead!

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