What to Do When You Are Feeling Like a Failure? | What to Do When You Are Feeling Like a Failure?

What to Do When You Are Feeling Like a Failure?

Anxiety

Tamika Lewis December 1, 2022

It is not uncommon for individuals to crumble under the pressure and stress of everyday life. The constant struggle to climb the ladder of success or be the best version of oneself can cause many to start feeling like a failure. There’s no reason to feel embarrassed or depressed when negative feelings overwhelm you. It’s important to know that a counselor for women can help you overcome negative emotions and gain a positive mindset.

What Are the Most Common Reasons People Start Feeling Like a Failure?

Certain situations have a different impact on each individual. Failing to achieve certain goals, such as getting a promotion, qualifying for a marathon, or mending relationships, may cause many to struggle with feelings of inadequacy.

As time goes by, many people succeed at coping with these shortcomings, but others start questioning themselves and their choices. Here are some of the most common reasons for feeling like a failure:

  • The constant work stress caused by the need to be successful,
  • Comparing your failures to other people’s best moments,
  • Anxiety about going back to school and insecurities about meeting the requirements,
  • Unrealistic expectations,
  • Negative past experiences,
  • Breaking up a long romantic relationship,
  • Pressure to do your best and keep everyone happy,
  • Poor self-esteem,
  • The negative impact of social media on one’s self-worth,
  • Friends and family’s unrealistic demands and nagging.

How Can Feeling Like a Failure Affect Your Life and Relationships?

When you start getting overwhelmed with negative feelings and thoughts of your shortcomings, you initially start getting frustrated. You might see yourself acting out of character and trying to do everything in your power to fix the issues. But, when you realize that you can’t meet the goals and standards that you intended to, it might cause you to get sucked into a downward spiral.

With the acceptance of negative emotions comes withdrawal. You might start to put yourself down, avoid your family and friends, and think there is no silver lining or a way to get everything back on track. The anxiety symptoms that start to manifest can be paralyzing, hindering you from acting and changing your situation. These are all signs that you are mentally exhausted and that you are in need of support and a solution so you can make it through this rough patch in life.

Couple fighting
The pressure of failing to achieve your goals and aspirations can have a detrimental effect on your mental health

How Is Depression Different From Feelings of Inadequacy?

Having low self-worth coupled with the stress of not being good enough does seem, at first, to be similar to depression. But, it should be stressed that depression is considered a serious medical illness that affects a person’s way of life. According to the World Health Organization, it is estimated that 5% of adults suffer from depression.

Someone who has a depression diagnosis is usually treated with medication and psychotherapy. Symptoms of depression are lack of energy, helplessness, crying, sleeping more or less than usual, and anger. Even though feeling like a failure is similar to depression, it doesn’t have to lead to serious treatment and a mental health crisis.

If addressed on time, your negative emotions will be just a passing phase, a part of your journey you can learn and grow from. A setback or a current disappointment can just spark temporary negative emotions. Learning how to deal with stress and also why self-care is important can help you tremendously heal and get back on track.

Why Reaching Out for Support From Friends and Family Might Not Help?

The first thing we all do when we develop negative thoughts and emotions is reach out to friends or family and share our struggles. Some people might offer their own stories of struggle and disappointment as well as comfort you with words of affirmation. This might feel great for a couple of hours or even days, but the same emotions can start to creep back in.

Other individuals might dismiss our issues as a part of a mid-twenties crisis or just a quarter-life crisis that you can easily snap out of. This can hurt someone even more, causing them to feel that they are the problem and that there is something very wrong with them from the start. This is detrimental to anyone’s mental health and should be avoided at all costs.

Even though family members and friends are there to help us, they usually cannot know the full scope and intensity of our problems and help us as a therapist can. So it is best not to lean on them for support in every situation. Also, don’t feel that you are a problem if someone from your surrounding cannot understand what you’ve been dealing with.

A woman comforting another woman who is stressed
Seeking comfort from family and friends can leave you thinking, "is something wrong with me" and "why do I feel like a failure at all"

How to Deal With Feeling Like a Failure?

There are numerous helpful methods you can utilize to stop negative emotions from impacting thoughts and actions. These self-care ideas for women and useful tips for overcoming a mental health crisis could stop the onset of serious illnesses such as depression. It is great to know that there is a way to feel how powerful, confident, and worthy you are. Let’s delve deeper into what you should do.

Put Into Practice a Helpful Method – Positive Affirmations

Eckhart Tolle, a spiritual teacher, once said, “the primary cause of unhappiness is never the situation but your thoughts about it.” But, how do you change your thoughts? A great tip is to use positive affirmations. Positive affirmations can make you “rewire your brain.” With positive affirmations, start embracing yourself with more confidence.

What you should do for the first 20 days is start meditating and repeating positive affirmations to yourself, such as:

  • I am good enough.
  • I am successful.
  • I am confident.
  • I can do it.

If you find it hard to concentrate during your meditation, make sure that you write down all of the positive affirmations in your journal. Read them throughout the day in order to replace the old patterns in your mind with the new ones. What is more, use sticky notes and place self-worth affirmations on your mirror. By doing this, every time you look at yourself in the mirror, you’d be reminded of just how smart, beautiful and successful you are.

Women holding papers with positive affirmations in front of them
Positive affirmations can help you change your attitude about yourself and your thinking

Don’t Dwell On Your Mistakes or Negative Thoughts

It is essential not to dwell on past mistakes, disappointments, and fears that can cause negative thoughts. We can learn from them and move on, but when you think about something that makes you anxious for a long time, you will lose mental clarity. You have to stop fear and anxiety from overpowering your thought process. A helpful self-care tip is to switch every negative thought with a positive thought as soon as you notice it’s influencing your mood.

For instance, you might think about the situation when you got fired or a heated argument between you and your partner. Don’t dwell on these past situations but rather replace every negative thought with something amazing from your life. You can think about when someone gave you a wonderful compliment or when you got recognized for doing a great job. This will immediately boost your self-esteem and remind you of your achievements.

Stop Pushing Yourself to the Limit

You need to know that sometimes it’s important to take time to relax and enjoy yourself. Life is not a competition, even though social media tends to present it that way. Don’t believe people who are telling you what to do and how to live your life. Don’t let other people’s opinions affect the way you feel about yourself.

We recommend that you take a deep breath and start practicing awareness. Be thankful for everything you have at this moment. Don’t focus on achieving big goals, but rather take pleasure in taking small steps and measuring your success as you are approaching your dreams. Even a small win that might seem insignificant at first can later bring you great results. Therefore, it is fine to slow down and take small steps towards success.

Woman smiling and hugging
Let yourself enjoy the present moment and everything good that you achieved up to this point

Therapy Might Be Another, Highly-Effective Solution

Opening yourself up to therapists and showing your vulnerability and emotional pain can be the most empowering thing one can do. Keeping emotions and issues bottled up inside can only cause more problems for your overall health. If you feel that you need someone to guide you through this tough time, therapy for women would be the best choice. You will have an opportunity to talk about your traumas and fears and learn how to cope with them on a deeper level, and take care of yourself.

Choose a therapist you are most comfortable with and begin to delve deeper into the core of your true problems. It will give you the freedom to express and confront everything that has been weighing heavily on your heart. Don’t expect to get well immediately after the first therapy appointment. It will take time to heal and understand the source of your fears and anxiety.

You Have to Deal With Your Feelings Before They Cause More Problems

Mental health should always be a priority. When you start feeling anxious or like you’re not good enough, rely on helpful methods and counseling for women. Positive affirmations and taking time to relax can change your negative self-talk into confident and reassuring thoughts. However, sometimes we cannot do everything on our own. In this case, a therapy session can be the best option. If you want to find the root of your problems and heal through counseling, contact us and book a free consultation.Have you started feeling like a failure, and you don’t know how to manage your feelings effectively? Here is how to gain a positive perspective on life.

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