How to Know When to Break up With Someone | How to Know When to Break up With Someone

How to Know When to Break up With Someone

Relationships

Tamika Lewis April 15, 2022

Endings are never easy, and you can never be certain enough when to end things with someone, especially when it comes to the person you genuinely care about. If things have been bad for a while now, you must be wondering how to know when to break up with someone? Here are some common red flags you should keep in mind and start preparing yourself for making that difficult decision.

The truth is that you can never be 100% sure what’s the right decision, but you should definitely know when to draw the line and spare yourself the pain and struggle. After all, in a relationship you should feel happy and comfortable, not insecure or sad. It is always better to be single and happy than to be with someone and struggle all the time.

When Should You Give Up on a Relationship?

Being in a romantic relationship is not all milk and honey, and we all have many imperfections. The key is to find someone who will like you for who you are and vice versa. If you’re mature enough, you understand that not everything can be perfect, especially if you spent a lot of time with this person and went through different life phases and difficult situations together. However, you can’t keep coming up with excuses for your partner if you’re not satisfied.

How Do You Know if It’s Time to Break Up?

You should always communicate with your significant other about how you feel and work on improving your relationship. However, being stuck in a toxic relationship while believing that the other person will change eventually or even worse – that you’ll never find anyone better is a serious red flag. You can’t keep waiting forever for things to change.

At some point, you have to put yourself and your mental health first and end things that are not leading anywhere. Sometimes no matter how hard you try to keep everyone happy and work on yourself, you might discover that the other person is unwilling to put in the same effort. Your partner should be your biggest support and the wind in your back – not someone who makes you feel down.

therapy for women of color
How do you know when to break up with someone? You can tell that something is wrong if you are no longer feeling happy

What Are the Signs That a Relationship Is Over – You’re Struggling, and Your Partner Doesn’t Want to Cooperate

Emotional intelligence is essential so people can function as a part of a society and maintain any kind of relationship, not just romantic ones. One important characteristic that shows that you are emotionally intelligent is that you can recognize other people’s feelings and read between the lines by observing their expressions.

You can actually learn a lot about someone by paying attention to how they treat others. So don’t focus on their behavior only when you two are alone because that could trick you. Strong relationships are built on mutual trust and respect, but you should always keep your eyes wide open beware of these signals. Here are the most important signs that indicate it’s better to go separate ways.

Lack of Communication

Remember the time when you two met and started talking non-stop? Hours and hours of sharing all your thoughts, memories, jokes, and that feeling of wanting to spend every minute talking to that special someone even if you are not with them.

When things between you two are wrong, you’ll quickly notice that by the lack of communication or the feeling that nothing you say is good enough for your partner or vice versa. They don’t understand you anymore, no matter how hard you try to explain yourself and all those discussions that last for hours lead nowhere than to bigger issues and more fights.

Aggressive Communication in a Relationship

You have to learn how to deal with stress when in a relationship because if one of you constantly reacts aggressively, it is just a matter of time when things will escalate, and then there is no way back. Such behavior can often be a defense mechanism, but still, it is not something you should stick with.

You should learn how to take care of yourself and know when enough is enough. It is also good to maybe even see a therapist and learn why self-care is important, it will help you recognize the signs that show you are mentally exhausted and the ways this affects your current relationship.

The Absence of Physical Intimacy When You Are Together

This can be one of the easiest things to notice, especially if you’re in a relationship with someone who used to constantly show their affection by holding your hand, touching your hair, or just overall being a touchy and gentle human. If you notice that they don’t hug you or even touch you when you are together or alone, something is off. Without physical contact, your bond will weaken, and you’ll feel disconnected.

You Started Thinking About Other People

The impact of social media nowadays is huge, and it’s easier for people to reach out and talk to basically anyone online. But regardless of that, you and your partner both can meet other interesting people and become romantically interested in them. If you notice that they rather spend time with friends or colleagues from work, you might get suspicious or maybe even jealous.

You might start expressing some anxiety symptoms if your partner doesn’t answer the phone or ignores your text. Even one of these signs can be enough for someone to walk away from a relationship, but some people are still willing to ignore all those red flags hoping that one day magically, everything will get better. Therapy can work if you both are ready to work on your relationship, so you should definitely consider it or at least try to book the first appointment for yourself and talk to a professional about what’s bothering you.

Couple talking to a therapist
If you still like your partner and want to work things out, maybe it is time to seek professional therapy

How Do You Know You Shouldn’t Break Up? These Are the Signs That Show There Is Still Some Hope for You Two

It is hard to tell how to know when you should break up with someone, but it is even harder to know when it is worth it to keep fighting for what you have. We often tend to exaggerate and overreact, which is why it is essential to think rationally and strive to see the bigger picture.

Don’t make any rushed decisions you might regret later. Sometimes everything can be solved easily if you two are honest and willing to communicate. Here are the signs that show you two should give it a try one more time:

  • There is still love and good communication between you two,
  • You have a long history together or maybe even a family,
  • You like the way that your significant other makes you feel,
  • You are aware that your significant other is currently in a tough life situation – struggling with health, career, emotional, or financial difficulties.

These are only a few of the possible scenarios, but what connects all of them is that both you and your significant other are willing to make an effort and try to work on your future together.

Happy couple smiling
If you want to make it work, you need to work on yourself first and then on your relationship

If You Still Wonder How to Know When to Break Up With Someone, Consider Talking to a Therapist

Individual, couples, family, or group therapy can always be helpful in a situation when you are struggling to make some important decisions. In this case, you might wonder if things will get better if you break up with someone or how long it will take to get over a breakup. There is no one simple answer to this because every human being is different and has its own coping mechanisms.

If you and your partner are both willing to work on this, you can also see a therapist together and learn how to make compromises or discover that you simply can’t agree on important questions, and it will be better for you to take separate ways. In that case, you can always continue to work on yourself by finding emotional support or taking coaching sessions. It will help you move on with your life much faster.

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