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March 18, 2022

Social Media and Relationships – A Match Made in Heaven or Hell?

Social media and relationships nowadays go hand in hand, but what bothers many are the side effects of their combination. Are you the one who likes involving social media in your love life, or are you trying not to let it get you and affect your feelings? Sometimes, things we see on social media hurt us, they incite jealousy, doubt, and arguments. Let’s see what this infamous combination is all about and how not to let it ruin your relationship.

Social Media Has Numerous Effects on Romantic Relationships Even Though Some People Disagree

There is no point denying that people nowadays expose almost everything on social media – from what they eat, how they dress, to where they go, and most importantly, who they spend their time with. Some would even say that it is not popular to show off where you are if you do not intrigue your friends and followers with a glimpse of people you surround yourself with.

Depending on how much information you share, your love life could be affected more or less. If your partner is not on the same page when it comes to sharing some private moments, that could lead to more problems in the long run. Although it sounds trivial, talking about how many things you two will share online is now an important thing for couples. If you both are present on social media, it is essential that you discuss some boundaries and priorities from the very start.

Exposing Personal Life on the Internet Is Not All Rainbows and Flowers

People usually share only the good stuff, happy moments, and that can work as long as you are equally happy offline. If you’re an influencer or a public person, showing off some romantic details on Facebook and Instagram can be a good way to boost engagement, but it will also be harder for you to get over a breakup since everyone will notice. It can all leave you mentally exhausted and even more confused, so talking to a therapist could help you see the bigger picture and deal with the pressure.

How Social Media Affects Relationships in a Negative Way?

Mixing relationships and social media usually come with more cons than pros, and since the field is so slippery, you have to be careful if you want to save your relationship. Here are some of the most common negative consequences that many couples who overshare on social media face sooner or later:

  • The pressure of staying active – Sometimes, it is exhausting to post something constantly and stay active all the time. If one of you is forcing constant updates, this may lead to negative feelings and disagreements.
  • Disagreements – These can be various, but most of them are about how you see and use your profiles. From liking other people’s posts to following your ex-partners, there are many things that could cause a fight between you and your loved one.
  • Stalking and jealousy – This one is probably the most common reason partners argue. You can easily get tempted to stalk your partner if you get stuck in the overthinking phase and believe there is something bad going on behind your back. This can lead to overreacting, coming up with different scenarios, and eventually breaking up.
  • Constant comparison – Women often compare their relationship to others, even though we all know many posts are fake. If you’re exposing your relationship online, try not to compare it to other couples who do so. You don’t have to take the same photos or share all the presents you two exchanged.
  • Mixed signals – It’s hard to communicate your feelings over a smartphone or a computer, especially through texts and emojis. It’s also easier to hide if something is hurting you, but women nowadays are often pressured to play it cool and don’t start the “drama” even if something really bothers them. This is why communicating over texts might be bad. Always talk about important things offline.

There Are Some Positive Sides of Social Media and Relationships as Well

After all these negative effects, you might start thinking about shutting down your profiles and asking your significant other to do the same. But what about the positive sides? Are there even any? Luckily there are many of them as well:

  • Getting to know each other – the way we choose to present ourselves online tells a lot about us. So if you just started a relationship with someone new, going through their profiles on different platforms might tell you a lot about them.
  • It helps feel more secure – If someone is not afraid to share a photo or a status where they tag you and express their emotions towards you, that’s a clear sign this person is into you and is not afraid to show it to the world.
  • It helps when you’re in a long-distance relationship – If you two don’t live in the same city, or one of you often travels for work, you can feel less anxious because, through social media, you can catch up with your partner and get a glimpse of what they are doing.
  • It is fun – Sending memes, funny videos, and all sorts of emojis is fun and a preferred way of communication among millennials, including couples.
  • Memories – Like it or not, the internet offers many great ways to organize and store your favorite moments and memories. You can easily make online albums of important events, trips, parties, and you’ll always be reminded of some big dates as well.

Signs That Show Social Media Is Harming Your Relationship

Some of the signs that show that your relationship is affected negatively by oversharing your private moments online might show up even in the early stages of a relationship. This is a delicate period when you don’t know your partner that well, so social media can cause a lot of trouble.

It is very important that you discuss everything that bothers you and stay open from the very beginning to prevent future misunderstandings. Some of the signs that show that social media is taking a toll on your relationship are:

  • Making false conclusions based on social media instead of talking directly to your partner and getting information from them,
  • Not having quality time when you’re together because you both (or one person) are constantly online,
  • Obsessively checking social media accounts of your partner and stalking them, feeling insecure or jealous all the time,
  • The constant need for confirmation or communication throughout social media.

How to Keep Your Relationship Healthy?

It is crucial that you find the right balance between social media and romantic relationships, which won’t be easy. Balancing between these two aspects of your life can be even more challenging if you’re not completely honest about your needs and expectations.

Keeping secrets and faking things, in the long run, can affect your mental health as well, and that is one of the costs of trying to keep everyone happy but yourself. You have to stay honest and work on your communication, make your offline life your priority, or even better, keep it offline.

Always Make Interesting Plans

Ensure you always have plans with each other and spend quality moments together as much as possible. Although social media is important, you need to stay focused on your real life and the moments you spend focused on each other. You can plan so many different activities together and create memories without posting everything you do online.

Set Boundaries About the Things You Post and Time Spent Online

For example, if you are going on a romantic dinner, leave your phones aside and enjoy each other’s company. Don’t check your phone every few minutes, and if you take a photo or two, ensure you both agree on the pics you will share.

Always Stay Open and Discuss Every Issue in Your Relationship

If something is bothering you, be open and explain to your partner what your expectations are. No one can read your mind, so if you don’t say it, your partner might not notice the signals you’re trying to send or could misinterpret them. If you keep fighting over the same things and no one is ready to compromise, things can get too stressful, so the best would be to make a first therapy appointment or consider counseling for couples.

Don’t Let the Social Media Pressure to Stop You From Experiencing Real Love and Joy

If you believe that you have found your soulmate and you enjoy their company, it shouldn’t be hard for you to start living in the moment and cherish every second you spend together. Things we see online, like those perfect romantic couple photos, are mainly staged to create the illusion of happiness, which doesn’t always exist in real life. Don’t compare yourself to them. Keep your personal life private and try to avoid oversharing online.